How Victims Are Affected By Abuse
Repetitive abuse has long lasting harmful and traumatic effects like panic attacks, hypervigilance, sleep disturbances, flashbacks (intrusive memories), suicidal ideation, and psychosomatic symptoms. The victims experience episodes of depression, anxiety, shame, embarrassment, humiliation, guilt, abandonment, and an enhanced sense of vulnerability. In "Stalking - An Overview of the Problem" (Can J Psychiatry 1998;43:473-476), authors Karen M Abrams and Gail Erlick Robinson write: "Initially, there is often much denial by the victim. Over time, however, the stress begins to erode the victim's life and psychological brutalization results. Sometimes the victim develops an almost fatal resolve that, inevitably, one day she will be murdered. Victims, unable to live a normal life, describe feeling stripped of self-worth and dignity. Personal control and resources, psychosocial development, social support, premorbid personality traits, and the severity of the stress may all influence how the victim experiences and responds to it ... Victims stalked by ex-lovers may experience additional guilt and lowered self-esteem for perceived poor judgment in their relationship choices. Many victims become isolated and deprived of support when employers or friends withdraw after also being subjected to harassment or are cut off by the victim in order to protect them. Other tangible consequences include financial losses from quitting jobs, moving, and buying expensive security equipment in an attempt to gain privacy. Changing homes and jobs results in both material losses and loss of self-respect."
Surprisingly, verbal, psychological, and emotional abuse have the same causes as the physical selection (Psychology Today, September/October 2000 issue, p.24). All kinds of abuse interfere with the victim's ability to work. Abrams and Robinson wrote this (in "Occupational Causes of Stalking", Can J Psychiatry 2002;47:468-472): "... (B)eing stalked by a former partner may affect a victim's ability to work in 3 ways. First, the stalking behaviors often interfere directly with the ability to get to work (for example, flattening tires or other methods of preventing leaving the home). Second, the workplace may become an unsafe location if the offender decides to appear. Third, the mental health effects of such trauma may result in forgetfulness, fatigue, lowered concentration, and disorganization. These factors may lead to the loss of employment, with accompanying loss of income, security, and status."
Yet, it is not easy to generalize. Not all victims are the same or live in the same place or the same circumstances. For example, in some cultures, abuse is seen as commonplace and accepted as a legitimate mode of communication, a sign of love and loving, and an increase to the abuser's self-image. In such situations, the victim is likely to adopt the norms of society and stay away from serious trauma. Intentional, cold-blooded, and premeditated torture has worse and more long lasting effects than abuse meted out by the abuser in rage and loss of self-control. The existence of a loving and accepting social support network is another extenuating factor. Lastly, the ability to express negative emotions safely and to deal with them constructively is very critical when it comes to healing. Usually, when the abuse reaches critical and all-pervasive proportions, the abuser had already, spider-like, isolated his victim from family, friends, and colleagues. She is catapulted into a nether land, cult-like setting where reality itself will dissolve into a ongoing nightmare. When she emerges on the other end of this wormhole, the abused woman (or, in rare occasions, man) feels helpless, self doubting, stupid, useless, and a guilty failure for having failed her relationship and "abandoned" her "family". In an attempt to recover perspective and stay away from embarrassment, the victim will either deny the abuse or minimize it. No wonder why survivors of mistreat tend to be clinically depressed, ignore their health and personal appearance, and submit to boredom, rage, and impatience. A lot of them wind up abusing prescription drugs or drinking or otherwise behaving carelessly. Some victims even develop Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
Cure Your Depression Permanently
|
|